Just Because

When I was a child I used to write stories about unicorns on little pieces of paper and gave them to my mother. I wrote the same stories again and again. Yet they were never exactly the same. My imagination never seemed to tire of them.
I watched The Little Mermaid over and over like it was the first time every time, my imagination mesmerized and my attention captivated; drowning out every other detail of the world around me. It didn't exist, only the world of the ocean that sank so deeply in my mind's eye my heart believed its illusions. Without question. I still believe. I hope so hard, and confess I even pray, that I can swim and breath and wander the currents like I know them somehow, someday, even if in play in Heaven someday. Like the eternal, immortal way of child's play, just-for-fun pretend games-- but on the scale of infinitely possible creativity. Made possible and condoned by God; Accompanied by GOd's laughter and non-judgmental demeanor as He helps me indulge in such curious fun. Evasive, effervescent magical, sparkling light with hues of realms unnatural, casting glow and wonder, artful beauty to tantalize the senses and drive the force of discovery in joy. Just for the hell of it. Because God delights in pure joy and gloriously creative fun. Beauty. And He will, may He, I hope and believe, play with me just because He can.

I desire and I believe and my passions are awakened, illustrations stir in the elemental stars of possible creations within my heart. Until one day they collide with the ground-shaking, history-shaping truth of timing and the capacity to meet potential with hands that work. Together, hope and will and attempt can birth physical manifestations that once existed as particles of dreams that floated and drifted, ready to explode, within my heart, lighting despair with glints and visions of hope and future. Physical manifestations with spiritual implications. May we be careful. May we pray. May we be led.